The BIGGEST Wedding Phobia... The Speeches

Why? I don't know. Okay, I'm lying - I do know. I get it. Public speaking is one of the most widespread human fears on the planet. There's something terrifying about stepping into the spotlight in front of a hundred or so people and saying stuff while everyone listens - well, most listen. It can be nerve-racking... I get it. Really I do.

But here's the thing - when you make a speech at a wedding it has nothing to do with you. You just have to put your anxiety into a little box for a minute. At least, that's what I told my dad. I'm not picking on my dad... I know how much he hates speaking in a crowd. But you were able to do it right Dad? ...Dad?

He's over it... really he is.

There are a few key people who absolutely have to make a speech at a wedding... the people listed below are the bare minimum as far as I'm concerned. They are: the Father of the Bride, the Father of the Groom, the Best Man, the Maid of Honour, and the Bride/Groom themselves.

So here's the breakdown:

Fathers

Okay, so this is misleading because as far as I'm concerned it doesn't necessarily have to be the father who speaks. The idea is that a representative from each side of the family officially welcomes the newest addition to the family on the family's behalf. It could be done by the mothers or even a close uncle or aunt if a parent is deceased or something of that nature.

That's it... it's really quite simple isn't it? It doesn't have to be long, or drawn out, or fancy - it just has to be honest (or as close to honest as can be while still keeping it nice). It's your kid's wedding. Take a minute to welcome his/her spouse to the family publicly. (And maybe even congratulate them while you're at it).

Best Man/Maid of Honour

The next one is the BM and MOH - alrighty ladies and gents, you were selected for this role for a reason, right? At least I hope so. You are the leader of the troop of bridesmaids or groomsmen. You are the closest person to the bride or groom. You should have something to say, right? It's not hard to do by any means. Your speech should contain some element of thanks to the couple for asking you to be a part of their big day, a compliment to the groomsmen (for the MOH) or the bridesmaids (if you're the BM) on how great they look and/or how much help they've been to you. And finally, congratulate the couple - tell them how happy they will be together - assuming you believe this. If you don't - you really shouldn't be holding this title (and those flowers) in the first place... but that's another matter altogether.

That's really all there is to it. My sister was my MOH and although she has NO problems talking (and talking, and talking...), she was nervous as could be (which may have had something to do with the fact that she was still writing her speech just before the grand entrance). At any rate, she got up and made a lovely, heartfelt speech. Thanks Nee (xoxo).

The Couple

Next is the couple - this one tends to be my BIGGEST pet peeve of all the speeches. First, because some couples actually believe that they can get away with not making a speech (huh?)... Really? I mean seriously, all of these people have come together (some may have traveled very far) to be a part of this wedding. You should really give them some recognition. Not to mention all of the people who have helped you stuff envelopes, paint mini flower pots, count chocolate almonds, study dress beading (and then search the world for a matching tiara), and of course those who have listened to your endless list of pallet choices (which is something I can chat about for hours. Other people find it a tad less fascinating).

So basically this is your chance to show your appreciation. Let's not kid ourselves, this entire process has been about you. About your wedding colours, your dress, your flowers, your shoes, your hair, your centerpieces... and so on. Now that it's all come together it's time to breath a big sigh of relief... smile... realize that you've done it... you're here... you're married... the decor is beautiful, the flowers are stunning, the food is delicious... and it's time to genuinely thank all those people who helped make it possible.

And then of course, before taking your seat again, you'll want to thank your new husband for putting up with you for the past year (or more) while you planned every last detail of the wedding. Or, assuming you're the groom, you'll want to apologize to your new wife for simply shrugging when she explained (in excruciating detail) how the girls' shoes didn't match their earrings (you really did care you were just tired).

For some quick and very clever tips on giving a wedding speech visit Christopher C. Dave's blog. It's a great resource for any amateur speaker looking to make a good impression.

Cheers!

Sophie

Coverall Event Coordination

Searching for Inspiration

If you want your wedding to be unique and stand out from the rest you're going to have to search for inspiration in unique places.

Using Google to track down images of "Blue Weddings" will provide you with a vast inventory of photographs of weddings that have already happened. So if all your inspiration comes from wedding magazines, wedding websites, wedding blogs and the like you're sure to have a wedding that looks like all the rest.

For those brides who simply cannot settle for "what's been done" it's time to get creative. Here are some tips for flexing your creativity muscles:

1. Keep a notebook with you everywhere you go
You never know what types of things might inspire you. Keep a notebook in your handbag and when you see something that sets your imagination to work pull out your notebook and write it down.

2. Keep a small camera in your purse
A camera serves a similar purpose to the notebook except that very few of us are skilled artists (and even those who are may not have the time to sit and draw their inspiration). You may see a snowman made of three large balls of yarn that could provide inspiration for beautiful yarn bobble centerpieces for your wedding. Snap a picture of anything that strikes you.

3. Create an inspiration board
Take a collection of your images, your notes, colour swatches, and anything else that might peak your creativity and put it all together on a large bulletin board. As you find things that compliment your design direction add it to your board. As you notice things that no longer fit into the overall concept simply remove them from the board. This will help you create a strong sense of creative direction and an overall design theme.

4. Use your inspiration board to design your unique wedding
Your board may contain photos of contemporary condos with round paper lanterns hung in the corners to add light as well as a point of interest. Perhaps you can translate this to your tabletop decor and hang a cluster of round paper lanterns above each table eliminating the need for tall arrangements as centerpieces.

Remember, creativity can be learned just as any other skill. All it takes is a little exercise... so get practicing. Whatever your inspiration, be creative and have fun!

Happy Planning!

Sophie

Coverall Event Coordination

Selecting Vendors

Today's bride is savy. She treats every aspect of her wedding planning as a business transaction. Today's bride is also computer smart and she does much of her wedding research online. It's no wonder, then, that many of today's wedding vendors are found through google. However, selecting the key players who will either make or break your day should not be left up to the quality of their website.

I'm horrified at how many brides tell me that they found their vendors online and hired them without even speaking with them over the phone (let alone sitting down to meet with them in person). Taking the time to meet with your vendors is a crucial step to ensuring that you are selecting the right people for your day. Sometimes the DJ with the top-notch website is not the most charismatic person... which would be a big problem if you plan for your DJ to provide some fun and entertainment at your reception. You could find a fantastic website for a florist only to learn later that all of the images on her site were purchased from iStock so the arrangement you selected may not turn out the way you'd anticipated.

Taking the time to interview your vendors and their references is key. You want to make sure that you "click" with the vendor and that they really understand your vision. You want solid assurance that they are taking an interest in your wedding as a unique event and not just treating it as another pay cheque.

Don't leave the success of your wedding up to fate. Know who you're hiring and make sure that you feel good about your decision.

There are some key questions that you should be asking your vendors. Check back for tips over the coming weeks.

Cheers!

Sophie
Coverall Event Coordination

Internship Position 2009

We've received many calls and emails at CEC from Event Planning students, and the like, who are looking to gain some real life wedding planning experience. So, after much discussion, we have decided that we will be taking on one student for an unpaid internship position in the summer of 2009. The successful candidate will be awarded a part-time, 12-week contract during which they will be given the unique opportunity to experience the wedding planning career first-hand. On top of this, he/she will have a chance to network with some of the industry's top wedding vendors.

More information will be availble early in the New Year. We will not be accepting resumes before the position is officially posted. So do check back often to ensure that you don't miss your chance at this unique opportunity.

All the best!

Sophie

Become a Wedding Planner

Do you think you have what it takes to become a Wedding Planner? Today, the Wedding Planning industry is exploding as more and more brides are finding less and less time to plan that once-in-a-lifetime wedding of their dreams - and they need someone to bring their vision to life.

Becoming a Wedding Planner is not for the faint at heart. We've all seen the movie and, I mean, who wouldn't want to kiss Matthew McConaughey, right? But in reality, it's a tough job that requires a lot of hard work and sacrifice. But if you have what it takes you can find a very rewarding career in wedding planning. Also, because you're considering the career at a time when so many Planners have been at it for a while you can benefit from the advantages of others' experience.

If you're seriously considering this path as a career you should check out the "Secrets of a Wedding Planner" website. This site, created and maintained by Jolyn Saramaga of Nuance Occasions in Edmonton, offers mentoring and support for wedding planning professionals. Jolyn offers regular coaching sessions, information on upcoming conferences, along with all kinds tips on the tricks of the trade. Another FANTASTIC site is The Smart Planner - this is among my favourite planning resources and I'm sure you'll find it handy too.

Do you have questions about becoming a Wedding Planner? Feel free to send us an email or give us a call and we'll get you pointed in the right direction.

Cheers!

Sophie

Coverall Event Coordination

About Sophie

I didn't grow up dreaming about weddings... like some girls do. I didn't have magazines and binders full of colour swatches and dinner menu ideas for my future wedding... in fact, I didn't even open a wedding magazine until after my husband proposed.

No, my love with wedding planning didn't have anything to do with weddings at all. It started when I was very young planning events for my local youth group. As young as 12 years old I started organizing group events. I loved thinking up creative activities and the challenge that came with ensuring that everything was covered (meals, breaks, schedules, instructors, teams, rosters... everything) I would spend hours visualizing the execution of the event trying to find something I might have missed... and I spent hours on the phone confirming details with all the participants (I am so thankful for the creation of email since then!).

That love for planning continued throughout high-school and university and into the early years of my career as an Administrative Assistant. I was great at what I did because I could anticipate people's needs before they asked for things, I could plan meetings, conferences, seminars both locally and abroad, without missing a single detail. I was good at what I did... but something was missing.

I found the missing piece in weddings. Finally, I could combine my skill and love of planning with my creativity and love of art.

But the transition did not happen quickly. Although I loved planning my wedding I never thought of doing it as a career. It was only after reflecting back on my wedding day that I thought perhaps there was a void in the industry that I could fill.

I planned my wedding, which would take place in Cornwall, ON, while living in Toronto. There were no wedding planners in Cornwall and so the thought of hiring one never even crossed my mind. Besides, planning was what I was good at... so I wasn't worried.

And all in all I was probably the model bride. I was calm and composed the entire day. I didn't get emotional or upset... I never once felt anxious or fussed over little things. But I WORKED the entire day. It didn't bother me at the time. I kept everyone organized with schedules and instructions throughout the day. I lined my wedding party up before the processional and gave them all final instructions (but they were already pretty clear on what was happening as I had run the rehearsal the night before as well). I directed the ushers to move traffic into the dining hall while the rest of the wedding party arranged themselves for photographs. I ordered everyone in the hallway before the grand entrance and ensured that couples stood with man on the right and woman on the left.

Throughout the evening I dealt with little issues as they arose (like choosing a new wine when the bar ran out of the one I'd ordered), searching for the wedding party for special dances, and so on. That was pretty much my day. And I didn't mind it... I didn't know it could be any different. It didn't occur to me that something was missing until I was reflecting back on the day and wondering why I didn't cry during the ceremony.

You have to understand that I'm a sucker when it comes to wedding vows. Whether it's a TV wedding, a friend's wedding, or the wedding of a client, I ALWAYS cry during the vows. So clearly, I expected to cry on my own wedding day. But I didn't. And the reason that I didn't is because my mind was already working on what I had to do next... where we would have to go... how I would get the guests set off in the right direction, etc. I didn't allow myself to get caught up in the moment at my own wedding!

It's sad, I know. But that is the main reason I got into this business. I can't go back and do my wedding over. If I could, I would have hired a planner to take care of the wedding day coordination at the very least. My mission now, though, is to take the work away from the bride on her wedding day... so that she CAN get caught up in the day... so that she can just enjoy herself and her family and friends.

THAT is why I do this... and I love every minute of it.

Anywho... enough about me... let's talk about you!

Sophie

Start Your Reception Off With a BANG!

Are you going to ban your DJ from playing the Chicken Dance at your wedding? I did. And now, in addition to having to provide your Disc Jockey with a "Special Dances" list, a "DO NOT PLAY" list, and a "Must Play" List, you also have to get him in on choreographing the overall entertainment of the evening.

These days you can't simply hand your DJ a bunch of lists and expect magic. Oh no, if you want a wedding that your guests will talk about long after the lights go up you need to be 100% committed to the enterainment process. You need to choreograph a Grand Entrance and/or First Dance that will have your guests clapping/laughing/singing or on their feet.

A close friend of mine choreographed a beautiful Grand Entrance with a Phantom of the Opera Theme. Her masked husband carried her theatrically through a cloud of smoke onto the dimly lit dance floor to the roaring sound of organs from the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack. After the dramatic entrance the couple shared a beautifully choreographed first dance complete with elements of their characters acted throughout. It was enormously entertaining and completely unforgettable.

So make a note ladies and gents, you're now competing for the top entertainment card among all your family and friends who will be getting married in the next couple of years. If you want your wedding to stand out you have to make an impact.

To this end, so many couples are now seeking expert training to make their Grand Entrance, First Dance and/or their Wedding Party dance really spectacular. So I've come up with a few tips to help you make the biggest impact and ensure that your guests will remember your wedding as "the best they've ever seen". Here's how:

1. Choose a theme. When choosing a theme for your wedding make sure you carry it throughout. That means in the decor, the attire, the bouquets, the guest favours, the stationary, and of course, your entertainment. Choose music that suits the theme and choreograph a Grand Entrance or First Dance that suits the theme.

2. Find inspiration in books, magazines, movies, and on TV. If you're doing a beach theme, for example, consider doing your Grand Entrance to "Kokomo" by the Beach Boys (You know, from the movie "Cocktail" with Tom Cruise). As your wedding party dances through the doors have them present some of the guests with lays on their way to the dance floor. Then your Wedding Party dance could be some sort of fun choreographed Hula dance. Or you can go with a James Bond theme and have each of your bridal party couples barge in wearing sunglasses and creeping along like they're carrying guns. They can form a protective aisle for you to walk through to keep your guests from crowding too close ;)

3. Get your guests involved. Obviously, presenting your guests with lays as you walk through the door is one way to get them in on the action. But if you also name your tables after the places named in the song (Aruba, Jamaica, Bermuda, Bahama, etc) it will bring everything full-circle. Your DJ could have each table either wave their hands in the air or sing out when their table name is sung.

4. Bring your DJ up to speed. Make sure your DJ is fully aware of your plans and knows exactly what's expected of him/her. This would be best taken care of during a meeting a week or so before the wedding. Don't ask your Best Man to brief the DJ 5 minutes before the Grand Entrance. Also, provide your DJ with clear written instructions so that there's no confusion. Make sure your instructions include the full names of your wedding party members listed in the order they will be presented.

5. Check with the facility Manager. Some facilities have restrictions on what you can and cannot do. So before rehearsing an Entrance with sparklers and confetti make sure that there's no rules preventing you from using these items.

6. Rehearse! Okay, so it's not always possible to get your DJ and your entire Wedding Party in one place prior to the wedding date to do a physical walk-through of the Entrance. However, make sure that your wedding party is fully aware of the plans and that each person knows what he/she has to do. If you're choreographing a dance, it goes without saying that you'll have to get your wedding party together at least a couple of times before the big day to run through the steps.

7. Have FUN!!! The absolute best way to ensure that your guest get into the right mood is to get into it yourself. Make sure your wedding party is smiling and dancing as they walk into the hall -- if it looks like you're all having fun your guests will have fun too. Watch for this when you go to other weddings. When the wedding party dances in with big smiles the guests' faces automatically light up. It really sets the mood for the rest of the night.